Fart Patio


veganmofo

Labor Day 2013 has been a massive success. How do two adult children with too much time and very little motivation spend this free, labor-free day?

1. Recover from hangover with giant Chipotle burrito. Being on the West coast has it’s perks and the braised tofu sofrita option is a huge one – nothing like mexican food to absorb an evening of frivolity and regret.

2. Do laundry. And by ‘do laundry’ I mean put a load in and forget to move it to the dryer until it’s to that questionable point where you hover over the washer deeply inhaling the wet clothes and deciding between another wash or 5 additional dryer sheets is the solution to masking the mildew scent

3. Re-watch 4 of the 6 episodes of BBC’s Sherlock and both decide that if Benedict Cumberbatch professed his love to either of us, the moral and logical thing to do is to break up. Then of course comes the conversation around how we would divide our shit (I hope that never happens – I have no use for so many towels and growlers).

4. Watch Star Trek to get hyped up for Star Trek Into Darkness (Amazon early purchase option bitches). Again, Benedict Cumberbatch – noms. Evan decided if Benedict chose him as his mate he would want to call their son Quinn, that way he could be called Q. Cumberbatch. Get it? Yeah – stupid.

5. FOOD!!! Buffalo Jackfruit and grilled corn with homemade vegan ranch dressing. Recipe coming soon.

What a glorious day. Yet there is always a cost to fun, and in this case 2 days of alcohol and long training runs and vegetables our house sounds like an orchestra of trumpets and smells like a garbage pail kid. In tribute to that, let’s call it a “sensory experience” at the Schmidtman residence we give you this gem by our friends at Portlandia.

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