Procrastinating on Day One


It’s 11:16 PM Pacific Time and we are submitting the first blog post of the year on the first day of the year and, in typical Evan and Hayley fashion, waiting until the last minute to do so. But I will say…we have a great excuse. Today was spent traveling from the small town of Charles City, IA (Evan’s hometown) to the Des Moines International Airport to Phoenix then San Francisco and finally back to Medford. Oh, and of course there was the stop at Food 4 Less to pick up the essentials so then we don’t have to de-jammie tomorrow all day. Vacation days, consider yourself milked!

Oh, and by the way – HAPPY NEW YEAR! I will spare myself the delirium of posting our binders of resolutions (screw you law of diminishing returns – I say the more goals you set, the more likely you are to actually hit one. It’s that whole “a broken clock is right at least twice a day” or “throwing darts and see which ones stick” concept. I’m terrible at metaphors, but you get my gist) and we will share the big year of goals, tools, events, and adventures tomorrow.

Like all great ideas, this one began with Evan and I overdosing on Thai food and agreeing to publicly commit to something that may be over our heads, this time agreeing to blog every day in 2013. Again, be prepared for rambling and dick jokes.

It’s gonna be an awesome year.

Goal setting is making us lazy


Tis the season for letting ourselves go.

Yeah, there is the proverbial “letting bygones by bygones” and “Should auld acquaintance be forgot” (does anyone know what the hell ‘auld’ means? Up until writing this blog post I thought the lyric was “may all acquaintance be forgot” – which is kinda morose sounding yet also how I feel after most New Year’s nights when I’m stuffed like a vienna sausage into my hometown bar surrounded by the same people who used to point out my lady-stache and are now screaming ‘I KNOW YOU!’ into my ear then spilling their drink on me while I try to cover my upper lip.)

Anyway, I’m talking about the classic letting yourself go where all you can think about at work is doning your dumpy sweatpants, ordering Thai, and consuming diabetic-coma levels of sugar cookies while bidding on Jedi ornament’s on e-bay.  Last night we ordered so much food that the lady handing us the several bags at Lemongrass Thai asked how many people we were feeding. I lied and told her 3…but she knew. She knew.

Here is the good news: holiday sloth is not only totally acceptable, it’s encouraged. Why would you start eating healthy now when there are a dozen Holiday parties over the next few weeks? Listen, if Pamela Anderson and Kid Rock can celebrate their marital union for 2 weeks, the least I can do is celebrate Jesus’ birthday the whole month. (Evan says I’m reaching with my outdated pop culture reference. What is this, communist China? Ok, that is going a little far.) Oh, and any other time of year this behavior would be considered giving up hope, but December is the month for hope – and we are getting our goal setting on like a mofo!

Evan really went above and beyond for those beads.

Evan really went above and beyond for those beads.

Here is what we have so far:

  • I did a blog a few years ago where I took a picture every day for a year and wrote about it. ( Then this year we started this little gem you are painfully tolerating now. SO – we decided that in 2013 we will be combining the two ideas and doing a blog post every single day for the whole year. Oh boy, get ready for many days of quantity over quality folks, which happens to be where I thrive. Get ready for an increase of dick jokes and pictures of my awkward youth.
  • We are a fan of 30 day challenges – in which we usually only execute full for 5 days and then make concessions. BUT NOT THIS YEAR! Some example are a month: running 30 minutes per day, sugar-free, gluten-free, 30 minutes of meditation, reading a book a week, buying nothing but essentials, no TV, 200 pushups/sit-ups, and our January goal of eating all raw. Considering we are blogging every day, you will be going through it all with us folks. Brace yourself for adults bitching a lot about their white people problems.
  • We just signed up for a lot of running events including the Portland Rock ‘N Roll Half Marathon, Hood to Coast, and the Portland Marathon along with keeping our goal of one race per year. Many of these sign-ups occurred as a quid pro quo for eating copious amounts of indian food. The more food we binge on – the more strenuous of event we sign up for. This is sounding really sad.

What are some of your goals this year? How you will know measure success at year’s end? Do you give a shit? Ahhh, this really is the most wonderful time of the year.

Time to eat some peanut butter captain crunch and watch the Batman trilogy. Peace.

Video proof that vegans enjoy Thanksgiving


Well hey there.

Oh man, it’s finally here. When our normal lifestyle of eating pie as an appetizer, wearing stretch pants for 12+ hours, and cooking epic quantities of carb-laden dishes can be written off as ‘tradition’ and not poor life choices. This is probably how middle-aged life action role-players feel on halloween.

As a little treat for your viewing pleasure, we invite you to watch our 3 minute biopic of our inaugural vegan thanksgiving. Keep the judging of our low-budgetness at bay – it is thanksgiving after-all…a time to save all your aggression, despondency  and/or bitterness for black friday.

Enjoy – 2010 vegan thanksgiving.

A Spooktacular Vegan Mofo 2012




After the many sugar peaks and valley’s of eating my weight in Twizzlers (we didn’t have many trick or treaters), I have those same bags under my eyes.

It’s been an amazing Vegan Mofo 2012 – so much has happened! Let’s recap:

We also hosted the 1st annual vegan/vegetarian Meetup group Halloween potluck at our casa. As usual, we brought the deliciousness via Ulimate Vegan Chili (recipe coming) and VegNews Spooky Eyeball CupcakesNext up….VEGAN THANKGIVING!!! Thanks for an amazing Vegan Mofo!

I’ve never worked so hard to get bloodshot eyes. In college, it seemed so much easier!


And don’t forget that tomorrow, November 1st, is World Vegan Day! How will you celebrate?



Lazy Kermit & Hot Mess/Methadone Miss Piggy

(and the shamelessness continues)

Evan realized really quickly…fleece in a hot house means serious jungle crotch environments. Happy Halloween!


Nothing says sexy like a dude in fleece capris